![]() Another challenge: relationship management. Until then, everything in one color appeared equally important. It took me until well into adulthood to realize that I could color-code tasks to differentiate work projects from personal projects. Prioritizing, with my lack of filters, was harder. I’d batch errands, e.g., “Go to the bank on the way to pick up the kid.” To avoid misplacing things, I became very deliberate about “a place for everything, and everything in its place.” So I wouldn’t forget to take something with me, I’d leave it someplace where it would stick out that way I’d realize it’s out of place and remember why. Getting an A on a paper I waited until the last minute to write felt like a badge of honor, not a sign that my brain didn’t work like other kids’. In a highly structured school environment that didn’t demand a lot, it was easy to fake my way through. Not only are girls socially conditioned to avoid being perceived as “lazy,” ADHD and autism simply present in less outwardly noticeable ways in girls than in boys, so they’re often overlooked by specialists. This is, however, the norm for many girls with ADHD. I made good grades and never, ever got into trouble. ![]() I wasn’t that kid getting up and walking around the classroom. Why faking it only took me so farįor many years, I had no idea that I was neurodivergent - that I had inattentive attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, possibly even some degree of autism. There’s a big difference between knowing where the starting point is and feeling able to start - it’s not always as simple as “just pick one thing” when “one thing” feels equally important as 28 other things. A to-do list, even broken down the way the experts recommend, may or may not help depending on whether I broke things down far enough without feeling overwhelmed. Of course, having no filters means I can’t prioritize easily. For every five minutes spent writing, followed by ten minutes on Twitter, there’s always the chance that I’ll experience an unpredictable epiphany that throws me into a focused 30-minute writing session. I say it’s because every project is different - and that’s true - but I also work in fits and starts. This is also the reason why I can never estimate how long something has taken, or will take. I lack the ability to distinguish what’s important right now from what can be left for later. And no, I don’t dare allow notifications from Slack, Twitter, or anywhere else. Clothing color, facial expressions, jewelry, voice pitch, accents, and more constitute a barrage of sensory input that I struggle to filter out. Once a headline or a piece of commentary has drawn me in, I’m invested enough to want to know more, but an ad, a blinking GIF, or a suggested video can frustrate my best efforts. Why? Because I also have ADHD, and that crap is distracting. I’ve worked in marketing for seven years, yet I block all ads from my screen.
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